There's someone for everyone

Ok, so I went to see the only living member of the Holy Trinity of comedy (George Carlin) last Saturday. The hubby got me tickets for X-mas. I was as excited as a little school girl. George was performing at the Warner Theatre in DC. We had tickets for the 7pm show.

We got to the theatre really early (about 40 minutes early). Our seats were like 6 rows back (xxoo hubby). One complaint however, the people sitting behind us.

The didn't speak during the show--they weren't THAT stupid. However, they spoke for the full 40 minutes before the show. It was quite entertaining.

Before I go into dialogue, I just want to describe them for you. THEY WERE FUCKING ANNOYING!! The guy was a typical jackass weirdo trying to score with/impress a chick. The chick was the whiney, needy type. I knew right off the bat they were freaks. Ok...now the dialogue. As Hubby and I were getting into our seats, I hear this:

Him: I don't know, South Park is just not doing it for me anymore. They just don't suprise me. It's...I don't know. I mean they've been doing it what ten years now. There isn't anymore to do you know? I just can't watch it anymore. [insert more dialogue of a man attempting to sound smart by talking about what's wrong with an animated sitcome using really big smart like words].

Girl: You think they've jumped the shark? (apparently this is phrase used for a show that's over doing it just to stay afloat -- Happy Days phrase...they hubby knew about this...I didn't...ANYBODY else hear about this phrase?)

Him: Not sure if it's jumping the shark. Just not doin' it for me anymore.

Then he switches to an attempt to schedule the next date.

Him: Hey, you know "The 40-Year Old Virgin" is coming out on DVD soon. If you buy it, you get free tickets to see "Knocked Up". But I don't want to pay alot for it, so I'm gonna shop around for it. Wanna go see "Knocked Up"?

[Ok...um...advise to fruitcake: If you are trying to get a girl to go on another date with you, acting like a CHEAP BASTARD won't get you far.]

Her: [insert whiney voice] Oh I don't want to go see that movie.

Him: Why not?

Her: The whole premise of the movie is offensive. I just won't go see it.

Him: What's offensive about it?

Her: The whole thing, it's just offensive.

Him: So he goes on a one night stand with a hot chick and gets her knocked up. What's offensive about that? It's not like she has an abortion. I mean there would be no movie then. (yup he said that...)

Her: [getting agitated] I just don't want to see that movie.

Him: The movie is gonna be great. I mean almost the whole cast from "The 40-Year old Virgin" are gonna be in it. Come on let's go see it.

Her: I don't want to see that movie can we just drop it?

Him: Ok, ok can you just be nice for two hours?

Don't worry everyone, as bad as this date seemed to be going, they still talked to each other later. They even talked about going away together. What was even better was they didn't talk during the show. This made me happy because if they did, I would have taken a pen to either my eyes or theirs.

PS. Did I mention George Carlin rocks?