Driving late at night ritual

It's a ritual I have always performed whenever I was on my way home to my parent's house. Even now that I'm older, married, with a baby, I still find myself praciticing this ritual. In a way, it's a throwback to when I was a teenager/young adult and very much afraid of upsetting my parents. Just goes to show, no matter how old you get, you still try to please them. You are still their child.

This ritual of mine is performed in my car. Visualize it, I'm driving home, car radio blaring, me singing on the top of my lungs...get the picture? I'm coming down Surf Street in Beachwood, really not thinking much of anything, just listening to the music. Suddenly, I'll turn on Birch and go two streets down and go to make the left onto my parent's street. As soon as I get onto my parent's street, I instinctively turn down the radio. Then as I approach my parent's house, I turn off my headlights.

Don't ask me why...I'm still doing this...just did this last night. I guess there is a part of me that is still sneaking home, hoping not to wake up my parents.

-The BB
(short and sweet tonight, just like me...)

VOTE FOR DAYS AWAKE...please...

Bealeton vs. Beachwood

As you all know, I live in Bealeton. However, many, many moons ago, I lived in a town called Beachwood. Beachwood is a small town just like Bealeton. They have their yearly Halloween parade, yearly Memorial Day picnic, and many of the residents participate in yearly Toms River Founder's Day. In a way, I went from one small town to another. I have always felt that Bealeton reminds me of Beachwood in it's early days.

However, there are many stark differences between Bealeton and Beachwood. Well for one, Bealeton is located in Virgina, while Beachwood, is located in NJ. Bealeton is already passed the Mason Dixon line, so of course there are those influences in the area. But I will say, there is that conservative edge to Beachwood. Especially since Beachwood is located in one of the few conservative counties in New Jersey (Ocean County). So maybe in the end you can say there is that similarity between them politically...just not geographically. Still with me?

The people in Bealeton are different from the people in Beachwood. Well for one, white people run the 7-11 in Bealeton. I haven't seen a white person work behind the counter in a 7-11 since my first days in Beachwood. When I walked into a 7-11 in Bealton, I walked in and said "Wow, good for you guys! You got this 7-11!" (editor's note: There is NOTHING wrong with anyone other than a white person working at a 7-11, I'm just noting how RARE it is to see someone in NJ working in one...don't send me hate mail...I ain't hatin'!)

Since we are talking about 7-11's it reminded me of this post and makes me think...you would NEVER see someone from NJ using a piggie lighter. Someone in Beachwood, NJ using a piggy lighter would be shot, burned and have the shit kicked out of them (and I mean that in a non hate crime way). **Warning the remainder of the paragraph is bro infiltration...You would also never see a person from Beachwood break'n their promise to to take their brother (and his friends) to lunch, the movies, and six flags...she's now threatning to hang out with her "friends" and leave me alone, AGAIN! Do you know I thought someone broke into my house and I was home alone because BB was scrapbooking. Well I hope the BB keeps her promise tommorow...and no matter what BB says there's a lot of rednecks here (even if they don't wear overalls. I can already taste Chevy's food, I think that's where BB is taking me tommorow...now I gotta go look at the movie timetable.

back...Thanks bro for killing the overalls joke...Yeah so you would never see someone from Beachwood in overalls. I actually didn't know this you know. Yesterday at the mall, I said "Maybe I should just get overalls". The bro looked at me like I had five heads and was like "Where are you gonna get overalls?" I said "Here, at the mall?" He was like "There are no overalls in New Jersey." Ok...gotcha...no overalls in Beachwood...baggie jeans, yes. Overalls, no.

And while the bro did point out, yes there are rednecks in New Jersey, but they all live in Tuckerton and parts of South Toms River...so that doesn't count. In Bealeton, rednecks are all over. They can be anywhere. At anytime. But they are cool rednecks. Nice rednecks. Tradition loving, Marlboro smoking, country music listening, pick up truck driving, piggie lighter using, rednecks. Notice how I'm trying to cover my ass?

Finally, I have to say fashion is different in Bealeton than it is in Beachwood. While some people in both areas wear wife beaters, in Beachwood, you will see more high hair and spandex...while in Bealeton, you'll see more flat hair and stretchy pants. Although, I have to admit, there isn't as much high hair in Beachwood as their used to be. However, the farther up the Parkway/Turnpike you go, the higher the likelyhood rises that you'll see high hair.

I really have no way to end this...

Wow...my brother's interlude totally killed my steam...just had to say that...bugger isn't getting six flags...still getting lunch though...Besides, I like Chevy's...I think tomorrow I'll make fun of my Uncle Mike...bro can help me with that.

-The BB

Bathing Suit Shopping

Contributing writer today -The bro...who's pushing it with the Six flags bit...

My poor poor brother. What a trooper. As you all know, I've been staying at my parent's house with the boob for this week. I got here Friday. It's Monday, I'm bored (love seeing my family, but I'm actually MISSING housework). I decided that the boob, and the bro (who's off from school) are going to get lunch on me this week because i bored them to death figuring how to put on a bathing suit, jeez....I Know the Bro is excited, I even promised to take him and his friends to Six Flags! **I'll give you one hint where this blog post was infiltrated...

Ok...now the FULL Story...(if you aren't confused already). I decided that we needed to get out for a bit. So I declared that the boob and bro were going to the mall with me for clothes shopping. I thought any 14 year old would be happy to get out of the house, but apparently I was taking the bro away from some serious Myspace/AIM time. But away to the mall we went to get me a new post-baby bathing suit.

I am happy to say that I have lost all and them some of the baby weight (we've talked about this before and people and punching their voodoo dolls of me as they read this). Also, my old bathing suits are in dire need of replacement. The hubby loves tankinis which is fine with me cause they are comfortable and I enjoy them. This gave me at least an idea of what I was looking for.

Our first stop was Old Navy. Old, trusty, reliable Old Navy. Half my wardrobe is Old Navy. Almost half of my maternity clothes are Old Navy. I love Old Navy...however, I DIDN'T love Old Navy today. No good bathing suits there. No tankinis'...barely any one pieces...they only carry dental floss...in really awful bright colors. Obviously, I found nothing there.

My next stop was the Gap...took one walk around...and decided 'No'. Nothing there, they didn't even have shorts (which I'm also looking for--another story) and if they did, they were too expensive for my taste.

Finally, I decided to try JCPenney's on a whim. I saw some really really nice tankini's. However, they were only in sizes 8, 14, 12, (you get the picture, and I'm not telling you my size for fear of my life). Looking for sizes in Small, Medium, and Large, I was finally successful in finding this really nice maroon bathing suit combo. I went to the fitting room to try it on, leaving the bro with the boob. The bottoms were a bit small for my taste, but I figured one size up would be comfortable. Then I put on the top...well tried to. It was a halter tankini top, but somehow...I couldn't figure out how to put the *#%^@! strings into place. I got the whole thing tangled over my head. Finally, I flung it to the ground, got dressed and decided to find another tankini.

After a few more minutes of searching, I found this cute retro halter tankini combo that was a great price. It's nice and comfortable. My bro was totally patient through this whole thing. He watched the boob and was patient while I was picking out bathing suits. It's one thing to go bathing suit shopping with a girlfriend. Total other to go with one's sister. Sure I was pushing some comfort zone there (especially knowing that a certain friend of mine told him I'm a MILF--you are never living this down Kenazz). But, the bro was super and yes, he's totally getting free lunch out of the deal for going with me (and he got free Milanos and cookies). Six flags though? hmm...no...but great suggestion...maybe movie with a friend instead?

Love ya man!

-The BB

A Baby in a Bar!

Ever see Sweet Home Alabama with Reese Witherspoon (what a sweetie)? In the movie there is the scene where she runs into her old high school friend and the old friend is like "Oh it's so cool to see you!" and Reese's character goes "You have a baby...in a bar." I was so totally thinking that tonight when I went out with my family.

Right now, the BB is in NJ visiting her parents and bro. We went out with the next door neighbors to this pizza place called Pete and Elda's (sorry bro if I mispelled). Apparently this place is like 'Da Bomb' according to the bro. He couldn't believe I had never been there, but he forgets that I've been out of NJ for eight year. In these eight years, my family has started traditions that don't always include me, or I should say I enter into after that have started. Well I was honored to be added to the Pete and Elda's tradition.

We drove 40 minutes to this place. It's actually Pete and Elda's bar and Carmen's Italian Restaurant. We had to wait in Pete and Elda's for 35 minutes for a seat in Carmen's. They are both in the same building. My mom took at a seat at the bar and I naturally joined her. The neighbors also joined us. I of course had the boob, so where I am sitting at the bar, with a baby. I felt so absolutely white trashy! I almost wanted to say "The baby wants a milk, on the rocks". However, I didn't.

Actually, while we waited, everyone passed by and commented on how adorable the boob is. I of course thanked them and said "She's a good baby too". And of course she is. I'm so darn lucky. The pizza, as promised, was great. Very very thin crust and very very good. I can see how one can actually eat a whole large by themselves. I had four pieces, each a different type of pizza (we ordered three Xtra larges with half and half toppings). Apparently they have this promotions where if you eat the XXLarge you can get a free t-shirt, but honestly, I don't think Im brave enough to do that. Bro wanted to tackle an Xtra large by himself, but mom quickly told him he was delusional. I actually think in the end, he did.

If you live by the Jersey shore, Pete and Elda's baby is the place to go!

-The BB

PS. Go vote for Days awake already peeps...they are dropping in the charts!!! Gotta get them to Lolla!!

The Red Shed

Wow, I took a vacation dudes!! I'm back. Wanted to give you all some time to vote for DAys Awake (see previous post). Did you vote yet? If you didn't...DO IT...they need the votes.

Occasionally, my bro will say (either via email or phone) "I have a request from the rednecks on 17." I always know what this means. I'm not going to tell you cause I don't like incriminating myself and wouldn't want you to know I do anything illegal. The bro's request requires me to visit the Red Shed on 17/15/29. It's literally a little Red Shed. However, let me explain something about this place.

Next to the Red Shed is another red building (Clark Brothers). It's a Shooting range/gun store/fishing tackle store/whatever is required to buy something to kill a living being store. On a clear day, I can hear the shots from the shooting range (classy huh?). In front of Clark Bros. is a HUGE ASS stuffed bear that I'm sure was shot by one of the proprietors. Sometimes, on Christmas, they dress up the huge ass bear in a Santa Claus suit. I feel very sorry for the bear if he's Jewish. And of course during election season you can see every single republican candidate's sign in front of the place. Actually, during the last presidential election, they strung a huge 'W' on top of the head of the bear (feel sorry for the bear if he's a Democrat...actually I just feel sorry for him in general).

The Red Shed is next door to Clark Bros. It's a gift shop. There you can buy fireworks, beanie babies, Civil War memorabilia, cookbooks, and t-shirts that say "I shot my best friend at Clark Brothers." I find it strange that there is this cute, quaint gift shop next to this large shooting range, but you know...whatever works...

The first time my bro convinced me to go to Clarks Bros. for a 'cracker ran' we pulled up into the little parking lot. We saw the huge sign that said "FIREWORKS, Shooting range, Gun sales, Southern cooking classes". We naturally went into the large building thinking that's where the 'goods' were. However, when we walked inside, we saw a long line of guns...a very very long line of guns. Also inside were alot of gun owners. Apparently, in the large building the only thing they sell is the type of firestuff that kills...(we already talked about it). So then we mosied our scared selves out and walked over to the quaint little building that said "The Red Shed". In there they dedicated a whole aisle to fireworks (who'da thought).

I just have to say as I write this, I have always thought it weird how there's a shooting range...with a gift shop attached. My bro who has been reading this over my shoulder as I type it out would like me to point out that across the street there is a gas station that says "BBQ country." ?

Gas station/BBQ fast food joint? What other combo will we come up next? Church/video rental store (hehe, and not the good kind of video rental store...halleleujah!). And we thought the McDonald's/Gas station was creative...

-The BB

Teaching interview

First let me say...Happy birthday to my hubby. you better love that Dyson I got you (actuallY I know you do...a bit too much...like Scary Movie too much...but I digress). So like this blog is about me living in little 'ole Bealeton, probably time I started writing about living in Bealeton again huh? Yeah...

Last year, I was doing my student teaching internship. For my this task, I was assigned to teach in the Prince George's County school system in Maryland. The best way to describe this school system was given to me by a fellow teacher. She said "If you can teach here, you can teach anywhere." Powerful words...powerful, but true. Not to say I didn't love my intership experience. I think it made me stronger, and definitely a much better teacher. And I loved each and every single one of my students (even the pains in the asses). To give some demograhic information about my students, about 90% were black, and then after that, we had latinos, very few asians, and of course, caucasions.

I had to do this mandatory interview for my internship. As luck would prevail, there was a job fair in Fauqiuer County last year. I went in hopes of getting my interview out of the way since they were doing on the spot interviews. I wasn't entirely interested in going any farther than the first stage of job fair cause I was 9 1/2 weeks pregnant at the time of the interview (actually, maybe even more). I was interviewed by this big cheese in the county. Everything seemed all cookie cutter and going just fine.

After the formal interview was over, I was asked if I had any questions. I remembered how it always looked good to have questions at an interview, so I mentally brought up the questions I had been wanting to ask. I asked a few I don't remember then i remember asking:

"What is the demographic breakdown of Fauquier County?"

I remember feeling so smart asking this question and I remember the man's face light up as I asked it. "Actually" he said, "I wrote a report on this subject" (score one for me.). He continued

"Our breakdown is 10% black, 6% Hispanic, and we have four Eskimos".

...
I'm not kidding people, four Eskimos. he was infinitely proud of these four Eskimos. I have yet to meet the four Eskimos, but I'm sure they will pop up sometime. I came home and remember screaming to the hubby "10% black? 6% Hispanic? FOUR ESKIMOS?? They think that's diversity???"

In the past two years, I admit, I'm seeing more diversity filter into this county and I welcome that as a good thing. However, I also am seeing how totally wholly unprepared they are for this thing. Wishing them luck. Maybe in a few years they will have some outreach done to those four eskimos...sorry I just can't get over that they actually put that in a report...

Days Awake

When I was a sophmore in high school, I moved in with my dad and stepmom. My brother was on the way and I was on my way to starting over in life. I was about to enjoy a life of normalcy (haha) for a change. This included starting a new school and making new friends.

One friend I made was a guy called J. J was very quiet, very nice, and a very good listener. We met during lunch period and hit it off right away when the subject of music was brought up. He was learning to just play the guitar and bass and I came from a family where my dad played the bar circuit for many years in his band. He thought that was pretty cool and I thought anyone that played guitar, bass, or drums was cool. One day, we ended up exchanging numbers and thus began a few years of four hour long calls of not necessarily talking about anything, to maybe actually talking about everything, or maybe just listening to J play.

One of my favorite J stories (next to the day he fell in my backyard playing manhunt and next to a certain day at the Roxie--remember ya'll I speak in code) is when one particular time he was playing to me over the phone. My dad happened to be walking by me in the hallway and stopped in his tracks. He looked over at me as if to say "WTF?". He quickly said to me "WTF are you listening to?" I handed my dad the phone and said "My friend J is playing to me." Daddy listened to the phone for a few seconds, handed it back, and said "Tell him he needs to practice." Years later, when leaving a bar where we watched J play, I reminded my dad this story and I asked him, "So does J still need to pracice?" To which my dad replied proudly, "Nah".

I say proudly because both me and my dad couldn't be prouder today of my friend J. He's currently in a band called Days Awake. They play mostly in New Jersey, but they've been getting out there alot more. Their single "Day after Day" have been featured on the radio and recently, they are competing in the Lollapalooza Last Band standing contest. Basically, a bunch of bands duke it out for the last spot to appear in the festival. I am using this space to shamlessly plug my friend's band. Go out there and vote!! and you can vote everyday using every email you have. Please do this!!! J and his band have been working their tails off the past two years and they totally deserve this. First go check out their website, have a listen to their tracks, then go vote.

Like I said, I'm proud of my friend and I want to see his band win this. Even if the wanker doesn't read this blog (or his email or IM messages). :)

-The BB

FOAMHENGE BABY!!

you won't get a picture of me on here, much and what you'll get is going to be something pretty much like this. What you see behind 'me' is the mystical structure...Foamhenge. Yeah, you read that right Foamhenge. Someone from Winchester, VA had so much time on their hands, they decided to make a to scale replica of the famous Stonehenge out of foam and put it in Natural Bridge, VA.

This weekend, the hubby, boob, inlaws, and I visited Natural bridge, VA to go see one of the natural wonders of the world. We were walking the trail when we came upon an Indian village replica. I had the hubby take a picture of me being silly in front of the Indian Village. So the hubby goes "Here we are trying to take in some culture and you have to go and be you." Yet, as we drive by Foamhenge and balk in disgust, the hubby goes "Oh YEAH! We HAVE to go there."

I honestly couldn't help laughing my butt off as we got out of the car. I mean, is this supposed to be some Southern tradition? Go see Foamhenge? Can you see the commercials?

"Ya'll don't wanna go all the way to da UK to see Stonehenge? Come see Foamhenge, the next best thing. We shipped Grade A Foam all the way from Winchester, VA to build Foamhenge...the most unnatural wonder of the world".

Quiche Lament

My day was going fairly well, so you had to know a bomb was going to drop, literally...

Today was a club meeting of mine. It's board meeting day and we had to bring pot luck lunch. I had decided to bring quiche. Of course at 11pm last night I remembered I left the eggs in the car, so unfortunately, they were bad (didn't want to tempt fate, I'm trying to make friends in this club here). This morning, I got up early, went to the Food Lion, got more eggs and even got the hubby yogurts for next week. I came home, managed to get the animals all taken care of, the boob fed, and the quiche in the oven with time to spare (should have know things were going too good).

Somehow, between a call from my friend and getting directions, time slipped away from me. I was running 5 minutes late, no biggie. I took the quiche out of the oven, where it was keeping warm and I put it in my tuppperware pie travel system. I had the boob in my arm with a diaper bag and purse on my shoulder. I grabbed the container by the nifty handle and went to go out the door. That's when it happened...

PLOP! Quiche on the floor.

Ok...don't panic...my heart is racing, my mind is fluttering "God I can't do anything right". I had gotten up early, got the eggs, cooked, was ready...now this...it's gone...quiche is gone...well not totally gone, but not able to serve at a potluck...I do what comes to my frustrated mind.

I scream on the top of my lungs. Poor boob reacts to my catharsis by crying. Poor thing. I tell her Mommy's not mad at her (more mad at herself). I repeat "I can do this, I can do this". Put the broken quiche in the fridge (I have starved too much in my past to let this go to waste), gather up the boob, yell to Signal to eat the crumbs on the floor (not very nicely cause I'm still pissed and I'm pissed at her cause she at stuff in the boob's bag earlier), and go.

I drive down the rode towards the light by the middle school. I see that it's not yet green. I stop and wait as the light turns...but it doesn't turn green on my side...it turns green on the other side. You see it's sensor activated and if the sensor isn't activated...no light. I suddenly do my impression of the Indian guy in "Office Space" and bang on my dashboard in frustration. Suddenly I see my neighbor pass me. I wave meekly. She kinda just waves limply back. She saw my hissy fit great. I won't be walking in my neighborhood for a while...great...just what I need a reputation as a nut. Well not like we're tight anyway.

I stop at Food Lion, pick up an apple danish cake and chocolate mini donuts cause I need chocolate at this point. As I drive to my meeting I'm upset. I keep telling myself, it's not a big deal. I'm actually proud of myself that I did call the hubby to cry about it. I'm getting over it. I start trying to pay attention to the roads cause where I'm going is out there in Warrenton. Of course I make two wrong turns cause I didn't trust my directions...but I eventually find the place (wish I can go into how beautiful it is...another post). I get there and get all settled. One woman asks how I am and I answer her fine now. Then i tell her all about the quiche. She goes into a story of how she once dropped cupcakes in her driveway. I suddenly feel better.

I don't know, I'm still uncomfortable in this new group of mine and not sure if I'm going to make lasting friendships in this. I am making friends and I know it all takes time. There are many reasons for my insecurities on this, but I won't go into it on my blog. I've met some really nice people and I worry that I'm not giving off the best impression. But that's me I worry alot.

What bothers me is I didn't freak as bad as I normally would, but I did freak. And I didn't like the boob's reaction. I really want to work on not freaking as much. But sometimes, one just has to scream it out. I don't like go ballistic. But sometimes I big "ARGH" just gets it out. And I really noticed, especially after talking to the other woman, that dropping food isn't something that exclusively happens to me. It happens to everyone at some point. And in the end, I brought other food, didn't show up empty handed, and I got to keep a quiche for myself (yes I'm eating it, and yes it's damn good).

I made myself feel totally better by doing what every girl does to make herself feel better...I went shopping. You must understand I'm not shopaholic shopper, but I am bargain shopper. Yesterday I brought a toy at the local thrift store. I was looking for an infant swing, but they had none there. I decided to buy something just cause I spent time looking around. Turned out they were having a HUGE ASS sale. I mean HUGE ASS because it was like 75% off. Yeah. And we're not talking gunked up toys either. I got, yesterday this vtech Winnie the Pooh talking book toy for $1.50. Then today I went back. I got The Little Touch LeapPad with cartridge for...

$1.50.

FREAKING STEAL!! these things sell for $35 for the Pad and $12.99 to start for the catridges. I felt like a criminal walking off with it. But I felt like a damn good criminal. I also got another VTech toy for $2 and a book for like free...and something for my neighbor's kid for $2. Total spent today, $4.06...so actually something else was cheaper...it was awesome. So now I have two things for Tori's b-day already. Tell you what my neighbors may think I'm a freak...but I'm a thirty freak...so who cares what they think...heheh

-The BB

Are teachers stupid?

A thought for the day...are teachers stupid? Now I know the answer to this question, but do you? Time to back track to where I got this divine thought. A while back I went to work for one whole day (back breaking, I know). Until the children reach the right age, I've decided to substitute teache (yes I said children, we'll have more, but not just yet). While the hubby was home on vacation, I went to work (some vacation huh?).

My assignment was at the local high school. The English-11 teacher was sick all week so they called me to fill in. The first class was good except it was full of alot of students that weren't into doing the assignment. One girl in particular just outright refused to do it. She felt more compelled to work on her math homework (which I told her to put away). Later, while this girl was stewing in her seat, she heard a fellow student talking about the SATs, to which she made this comment:

"I'm not taking the SATs, I don't want to be a stupid teacher."

Of course I just curtly said "I'm not stupid." She of course replied "Who said I was talking about you?" After that I just ignored her.

Now maybe this lovey wasn't talking about me, but it got me thinking. Are teachers stupid? While some teachers don't even hold a certification, I look to myself for the answer.

I have TWO degrees. One in social studies education and another in the history of women and gender. I was the only one in the teaching program to even concentrate in that form of history. Everyone else was all conformist with American History, Latin American History, and Georgraphy. And I worked damn hard for my two degrees. For three semesters I had a 4.0 average. after that I maintained a 3.5. For my certification exam, I had to study EIGHT subjects. I scored an average score in part I and I scored two points shy of a perfect score in part II.

So...am I a stupid teacher? I don't think so. However, she seems to be someone who appears to have no ambition (well she could still go to college without taking the SATs, I'm just assuming she has no interest in it). I would love to see where she will be in 10 years. At least I have a job and always will.

-The BB

Mystic goes to the vet.

I find it ironic on 6/6/of you know what year this is...Mystic had a vet appointment. Background story here...Mystic is our 18 year old cat. He was my mother's co-worker Rose's cat for 8 years, then her co-worker Albert's cat for a few months, then my mom had it for oh let's see, 6 years, I had him for three now. I rescued Mystic from my own mom cause she was moving, couldn't take her cats and was just going to leave them behind (I'm sure she was being dramatic cause she knew I was just going to take them). Mystic, when I went to take the boys into my custody, literally kicked my ass before I loaded him into the carrier. He so didn't want to leave my mother. He was also, very very sick.

I called around after I got the boys and asked a woman in my town if she could foster them until my mom got back on her feet. The woman said to me "I'll take the 6 year old (Sterling), but the fifteen year old, do him a favor, put him down". She said this after I told her I thought Mystic had kidney disease. The words ring in my head today. Put him down? Why? After the shit life he had being shuffled around his whole life? As miserable as Mystic was, i couldn't do it.

Mystic continued to be a problem child for the first month in our care. He even kicked Signal and Lori's ass (Lori is a 100lb husky) one night. That night changed everything. To get Mystic off the dogs, i sprayed him with a water bottle. I chased him into a windowsill where even a broom wouldn't move him. I sat down on the floor exhausted...mentally and physically.

"You can't go back to her." I said, "It's either me or you were going to die."

I said it and I meant it. I picked up a towel, approached Mystic slowly and carried him from the windowsill. I took him right downstairs where I rocked him in a rocker. Ever since that day, Mystic has worshipped the ground I walk on. And in return, I had a battery of tests run on him. Turned out Mystic didn't have kidney disease, but instead treatable diabetes. He's a 100% different cat.

I won't say he's not a bastard though...I find it ironic how in the mail we got above post card in the mail today...while Mystic isn't a dog...the wanted poster definitely fits the mood. See Mystic...well sort of has a reputation in the vet world. And he definitely has scored a big one in the Bealeton vet scene. It's really something to go to the vet's office and see the vet approach the room, but look inside to see my cat, then quickly walk away and yell to her assistant, "I'm gonna need help with this one."

While Mystic has mellowed out in his old age...he kind of has this weird separation anxiety. His diabetes requires him to have blood drawn. Sometimes, he has to stay in the office all day. However, the first time he stayed in the office all day was for his dental surgery when we first moved to Bealeton. I went to drop Mytic off and I offered to help get him out of the crate (Mystic did this same thing at the old vet's office). The woman at the desk was like "we can get him out, it's ok, just drop him off." (as if to say to me, "Please you neurotic woman, we are professionals"). I literally said "Ok, it's your funeral" and left them with the Mystic bomb. Mystic goes nuts when I leave the room. He's worse than an 18 month old toddler. He's so scared I'm going to come back and he'll have a new owner, he just goes bullistic. At the dental surgery, it took THREE vet techs to get him out of the crate. I wen to pick up Mystic and the vet said "You have a very...interesting cat."

Fast forward to today. I drop Mystic off and there is a new guy at the desk. He goes to bring Mystic back and says "I'll bring your crate right back to you!" (hehe, newbies). After a few minutes, he shockingly comes back and says "Um, we'll have to hold on to your crate." "Can't get him out, can you?" I reply. No answer, "Good luck." I say and leave the whole office in stitches. Later in the day, i call to see how he is doing. The tell me his last blood draw will be at 6:30 pm, so he'll be ready to go home then. I asked how he was doing and all I got was "He's Mystic."

I was sure to be there at 6:25 because I know they are more than happy to get rid of him. Of course there was another couple in front of me picking up their dog from surgery, so they were like taking forever. Suddenly as 6:30 draws close, I hear...

"ROARRRRRRRRR"

...

If you are a parent, you know the feeling of "I'm so glad that wasn't my kid" whenever something bad happens. However, in my case...i knew it was 'my kid' and I just giggled my ass off. The vet explains to the other couple in the waiting room "We have a cat in there that doesn't like to have his blood drawn". Suddenly another ROAR breaks out and I figure it's Mystic being loaded into his crate (something else only I'm allowed to do).

In minutes he's brought out into the waiting room. He hisses at the receptionist. I bend down to look into his crate. "hey Poppy" (my nickname for him) "Did you miss me?" He head butts the crate, then he starts purring...I can't help but giggle. The receptionist gaffaws. I go to check out then i ask "Oh when does the doctor want me to come back?"

You HAVE to understand, my vet is a PAIN in the ASS in the way she insists on seeing Mystic every two months or insists that she needs to keep up on his glucose, yada yada. There have been times she's made me bring him in for a check up or a quick blood draw. She's always on my case about keeping up with his condition. And while I applaud her interest in my cat's health, I have to say this

1) I have 6 other animals
2) Mystic is 18 years old...what's the worst that's going to happen to him?

I wait as the receptionist goes to ask the doctor my question. She promptly returns and says, "The doctor says Mystic doesn't need to come in unless he's not doing well. We don't need to see him until his shots are due". (which is next year).

Go figure...we should have Mystic come for all day visits more often...

-The BB

I love Susie Bright

Ok...a blog you HAVE to read...(that is if you are open minded...don't come up to me later saying "that blog is shocking" because you aren't open minded...) www.susiebright.com. I love this blog so much that I'm posting it on my side bar here...I love Susie Bright. I want to grow up to be Susie Bright. She is awesome. Basically, she is a sexpert. She talks about all topics of sex...from how to do it, to how to raise kids and still maintain your sexual side. Susie hosts a show on audible.com called "In Bed with Susie Bright". I highly recommend it. Did I mention I love Susie Bright?

-Th BB

Would you like cheese with that Whine?

haha, I love that saying...first heard it from my mentor teacher. She used to say it all the time to my students.

Well this Saturday, the hubby, the boob, and I went to the Vintage Virginia Wine Festival. It was nice...but an extreme tease and slight let down for me. Extreme tease because I went as a designated driver. For $25, the hubby got in and got to have as many samplings of wine as he wanted. For $12, I got in and got a pat on the back for driving. Yeah me...I have to admit, I stole some zips here and there...but nothing to make me buzzed. And trust me, the chili pepper wine doesn't give you a buzz...it gives you third degree burns on your mouth.

I have to admit, while the festival had activities for children, they didn't really live up to the hype in my eyes. Then again, I was told by a friend that there would be cheese, bread, salads...in other words...FREE FOOD. No free food ladies and gentlemen. More like free slivers where people could afford a booth. The food that was there was an example in fleecing to be sure. $5 Lemonades and $5 meat on a stick. I kept thinking how in Takoma Park you could get the stick with fried rice for less...ah Takoma Park...they know how to throw a festival.

In the end, we sat on the grass and listened to some country/bluegrass music. At least it was a day out. I did notice a fad at this even that really seemed...well...stupid. As you know, some people at these things take their wine tasting seriously. At the door everyone is given a glass (for their tasting...also keeps trash low...you just keep refilling your glass). Well, do you know they make wine glass holders so people won't have to always hold their glass?

...

yeah, they ARE as cheesey as they sound. It's basically a larger version of a reading glasses holder for your wine glass. I'm sorry...if you are committed to this wine tasting, you have to carry your glass. And think about it...in what other ways is this just WRONG? First off...what if you don't rinse off your glass right away? What's to say you aren't going to get a drip of wine on your nice white blouse? How sturdy are these things? I mean really they looked to me like a leather strap with a leather pouch. Where's the guarantee that the glass won't slip out? Please, this is just the pinnacle of laziness to me. Bring a kid that comes with a stroller like we did and keep your glasses in there if you don't want to carry them around.

On that note, the hubby wanted to bring the front carrier to the festival to carry the boob so she wouldn't get bored. But in the end, I'm glad he didn't. Imagine him trying to weedle his way in to get free wine with a baby attached to him. I can see the wine stains on the clothes already...

-The BB.

Be careful in parking lots

So today, after a hard days work (like you know 4 hours worth...that's hard for me...), I went to draw out cash at the ATM and treat myself to some ice cream. I get my too expensive carvel blasted ice cream (that's what I get for shopping in the Gaithersburg, MD area) and I head to my car. That's when it hits me...the parking lot is a dangerous place. Why? All I have to say is...

S-U-V

They are all over. Them and trucks, you cannot get away from them. The hubby refuses to be turned to the dark side of driving, but I know we cannot avoid it for long. Our family is only going to get bigger and I personally am getting tired of having the dog sit on my lap during really packed car rides. Also not wanting to become Britney Spears and have a kid ride on my lap, yo...

But back to my problem with SUVs...they take up too much friggin space. Until our parking lots are made with bigger spaces to accommodate their bulk, I'm going to have an anxiety attack every time I try to back out of a parking spot. Why? BECAUSE I CANNOT SEE PAST THE DARN THINGS! Even with my full size-normal sized car, I can't see past an SUV. And of course EVERYWHERE I go I have two parked next to me. That's why alot of times I'll park in East outer Jabib so I don't have to mess with a potential parking lot disaster. 'Sides, walking is good for the mind and body.

Just annoys me, you know...especially when the SUVs park right on the lines...and I park all normal, like I'm supposed to. However, I have to turn sideways and squeeze out of my car in order to get out or in (lucky I'm skinny...or I'd never get anywhere). Oh and I try like hell to watch how I open the door because they are on top of me and I don't want to ding them, but do they watch out for my little defenseless car? Probably not...

Well, someday, when I have my eco-friendly mini-van, I can strike back. However, until then, I'm gonna have to get used to a doggie in my seat. Talk about getting pawed...